Lessons Learned While Dating My Running Shoes

I usually run one half marathon a year and that feels like one too many, but this year I did something crazy and ended up signing up for 3 half's in a 4 week time period.  I did not mean for it to happen, but it just did. Honestly, it has scared me to death because I wasn't sure I could accomplish it.  I nicknamed it my "Triple Threat".  The company for all 3 races would be fabulous and even though it terrified me I couldn't resist. My training was pretty intense, where I  pushed my body to the limits, felt pain, frustration, exhaustion, but never wanted to give up.  Even after a difficult day I would get back up and do it again.  How is it I am good at doing this physically, but when it comes to emotional issues, the minute it feels a tiny bit uncomfortable, I am outta there.  How is it I can run not one, but three races in a short amount of time, but can't seem to go on more than one date with a guy. I've come up with the conclusion that with this physical challenge is, I control it and do not have to worry about anyone else interfering, it is all in my hands. With the dating challenge comes emotional issues where you have to trust someone else and that is where is becomes scary.  I teased that I was exclusively "dating my running shoes".  I think deep down this gave me the excuse I needed to not date.  Spending time with my running shoes was emotionally safe and really do like them. They fit  my feet perfectly, cushion my every step, are super cute and give me an extra 2 inches of height. What's not to love.  HAHA!!
 Looking back at the this 6 week "dating experience" with my shoes I did learn a few important things:

• It may take a few dates to get comfortable with each other (even if they are super cute).
• Once you get comfortable there will be times of irritation. Take time to adjust and fix it.
• Not all dates are bad, hold out for the the good ones will happen sometimes when you least expect it.
• Even when there are bad ones there is something to be learned and usually a good memory of some sort. Something you can laugh about later.
• You will trip and fall.  You just have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move along.
• There will be pain, frustration and sadness.  However, the joy, smiles, laughter and feeling of accomplishment will far outweigh the negative.
• There will be times of complete exhaustion, where you don't want to do keep going or do it again.  This is key to put yourself out there and keep working at it.
• Take time to breathe and enjoy the little things. 
• It takes time, effort, energy and lots of patience.
• With active dating your heart will get stronger.
• Confidence is crucial.
• It may be scary to put yourself out there. You are courageous and stronger than you imagined. 
• Your goal is attainable you just have to put the work in and most importantly never give up.

 Dating my running shoes was initially a joke, but surprisingly I learned a lot about real dating.
 It has given me confidence that I can do it. I can survive. The pay off is worth the risk (at least I keep telling myself that).

 My "Triple Threat" goal terrified me, however I was willing to take that on.  I put in the work and surpassed what my initial goal was.  I defied what I was told and took time off with each race.  It definitely was not easy and the struggle was real, but I did it.

With this goal completed, maybe it is time I hang up the running shoes..... and take on the real challenge, finding the man that I want to share my life with and that of course begins with putting myself out there and dating.

XOXO

Tiffanee

The Challenge in the Desert

I recently had the opportunity to hike in Arizona with a group of people I really didn’t know.  In fact it was all unfamiliar territory to me.  The dry desert heat, the elevation and three hours of sleep.  I had no idea what I had gotten myself into.  As we started on the trail it quickly became an uphill climb and honestly felt it would never end.  I had to stop a few times to catch my breath, but finally made it to the top.  The view was breathtaking as I had not realized until then how high we had actually climbed.  We took a few pics and then pressed forward now descending down a steep pathway. Once at the bottom it flattened out for awhile.  I figured I had made it through the worst part. Then suddenly the group stopped.  There was a discussion that came to the conclusion it would be best for us to turn around and go back the way we came that continuing on the loop was not a wise decision. This meant I not only would have to climb back up the steep hill but descend the front side of it.  It was not easy.  Sweat kept dripping sunscreen causing my eyes to burn and my lungs were on fire.  I slipped and fell several times going back down the hill because my shoes had no traction in the dirt and rocks.

     In a recent conversation I teasingly told a friend that I loved a good challenge, but is it possible to love the challenge when we are smack dab in the middle of it. This got me thinking.  Challenges do not need to be completed instantly. Just like my hike you sometimes you need to slow down, take breathers, adjust your course of action and most importantly you don't have to do it alone. Others are there to pick you up, dust you off, walk beside you and even carry you for a bit if needed.

The funny thing about this hike is even through all the struggles I enjoyed every minute of it.  I never thought about quitting or even complaining. It was all because I had great support and I listened to my body the same essentials we need to remember during a challenge.

XOXO

Tiffanee

The Sunshine Chicken Failure

      I love to cook and sometimes it can be a real adventure. I go on streaks where everything I make is a new dish.  One day when my kids were little I decided to make a dinner with a recipe I found for Sunshine Chicken and Rice. I prepared it just as the recipe said.  Placed servings neatly on each dinner plate and my hungry family started to eat. Almost immediately the gagging and disgusted faces were unanimous across the table, it was horrible completely not edible. We ended up throwing it out and ordering pizza. It was a true cooking failure
     Recently, my daughter sent me a message about just failing a final test which meant she failed the course.  She was devastated.  She felt like a failure and that her life sucked.  A few days later my son ran what would possibly be the last race of his college career and did not end up with the time he had been striving for.  He was very disappointed and felt like he had failed.  Recently, my friend and discussed our dating situations, how we both considers just giving up as we were failing.

      Theses situations got me thinking about life and how we often focus on the "one" failure.  How we can spend lots of time and energy wondering how it happened and wishing the outcome could of been better.  I have been in this situation many times.  At times it can feel so tragic that you feel that your life sucks because you failed.  Fact is....It does not make you a failure.
     Ask yourself does this one thing matter in the scheme of life? Think about the successes you have had.  For example such as how many classes you have passed, how many races you have ran well, how many dates that you have been on that have been good, etc.  Just as my Sunshine Chicken was total failure it didn’t mean I was a bad cook. I definitely didn’t make that dish again, but I’ve been adventurous and made lots of  delicious meals. When you have failures you may be hesitant to try again.  Instead  pick yourself up, hold your head up and high and go for it.  You got this!!

XOXO

Tiffanee

Going Up Hill...

   
     When I get an itch, I just have to scratch it and in this case it was the itch to race.  I found one that was not far away and for a decent price so I signed my girls and I up with only a few days until race day.  We arrived at the site and it was pouring rain to find the start was straight up a pretty decent sized hill.  I had ran to the bathroom shortly before the start and missed the directions given regarding the race course.  I made it to line just in time for the gun to go off.  I made it up the hill and then it was a pretty good decent back down.  It then went around and headed right back up the hill.  Just when you thought it was going to taper off you'd turn a corner and find another switchback going up.  I powered through thinking I can make it, only to find when I reached the aid station that I had to do that loop 3 times.  The second time I hit the hill was quite a bit slower and I found myself having to walk more than I ran so I did not die. I was soaked and the trail was getting more muddy by the minute.  By the time I hit it the third time I was smart enough to use my arms and power walk the hill.  Which took the chance of slipping on the mud out and was much easier on my body.  After finishing my last loop it was straight up the hill for a half mile and a very short gradual decent to the finish line.

     This got me thinking about certain trails or problems that you think you made it though only to find out you are dealing with it again. Why does this happen?  Isn't it enough to survive it once?  I came to the conclusion just as that day on the hill loop with each loop up it I learned something different and with each loop I got smarter and stronger.  When we experience a trial more than once it is because we have more learning and growing to do. Perhaps we are not ready for the big chunk all at once and it's the growth that occurs with each step we take.  Giving us what we need each time until we realize the changes that happened. It is then important to recognize the extra growth and strength we have been given because of our multiple trips "up that hill".
      Life can’t always be on a flat surface because we would never grow.  After completing 3 loops of hills I thought I would not make it up the last hill to the finish, but knew I had to.  Not only was it my goal, but the only path to the finish line.  Henry B Eyring said, “If you are on the right path, it will always be uphill."  Set your sights on that path, look upwards, and take those steps.  Each step will bring growth and strength, but most importantly bring you closer to your goal.  During trials don’t be afraid to ask for help, keep moving, believing, loving and doing. Before you realize it you’ll be enjoying the beautiful view from the top of the hill.

XOXO

Tiffanee

Is it Helping or Hurting?

I have a foot injury that likes to rear it’s ugly head every so often.  I’ve found if I can catch it early enough I can prevent the pain from getting full blown.  This morning I woke up to tightness and a little pain, so I thought I’d take quick action and put the compression sleeve on my foot.  Immediately after putting it on I felt relief and comfort. I wore it for a couple hours before putting on my shoes and heading out for a run. Less than a mile into my run the pain came back and continued to get worse with each step.  I began to wonder if it was my shoes or maybe I just needed to break down and get some special insoles. At about 2 miles the pain became so intense I began to think I wasn’t sure if I could make it home. I began to think about how this pain had not been happening all week. I came to the conclusion that the only thing different was the compression sleeve. I hobbled to a bench and removed the sleeve. I put my sock and shoe back on and decided to keep going for a bit just to test it out.  The pain was gone and all I felt was a little tightness.
Sometimes what we think is helping may actually be hurting us. Things might feel so comfortable and a perfect fit at first that we don’t realize when slight pain starts occurring. Once it turns painful we might look for other things that are causing the pain and overlook the true cause because it felt so good at first that we dismiss the fact that it could be the cause. If we don’t figure this out, not only could the pain become unbearable, but could be damaging. This is why we need to really start examining the situation when we first start noticing the discomfort. Look at the things that changed or happened just prior. This is crucial to watch for in life and especially when entering into new relationships. They often can feel so incredible at first that you do not see or feel issues arise or often doubt that it could be the problem. To alleviate pressure, just remind yourself to stay present and open. Listen and stay curious, but pay attention to things that do not feel right and figure out why they feel that way. Most importantly be true to yourself and trust what your gut instinct is telling you.
I am thankful I figured out so quickly what was causing my issue that morning. It definitely saved me from extra pain and possible damage to my foot. Removing the cause took me from thinking I would not make it home to running an additional 6 miles before returning home. My foot was not at 100%, but proof that some times things we think are helping can actually be causing us problems. Life is tough enough without having this type of pain added. Once we figure it out and remove or fix the cause we can continue to move forward in this incredible journey of life!

XOXO

 Tiffanee 

What are You Hiding?

     Recently, I got sick and literally felt like death.  It was all I could just to move from one place to another.  I don’t remember the last time I was this sick.  After 2 days of suffering a friend convinced me to go see a doctor.  Of course just because it is who I am I showered and did my best to look presentable in public even though I felt awful.  The nurse called me back and we talked about my symptoms.  She said you know it’s sounding like the flu, but you don’t look bad enough to have it.  When in my mind it was all I could do to sit on that bench, not curl up in a ball on the floor and cry.
       How often do we meet people that appear to be just fine, when in reality they are facing battles on the inside?  It has been said that it’s not always the tears that measure the pain, sometimes it’s the smile we fake. Why do we hide our emotional pain or battles from others?  The motives are fear based.  We are afraid of looking weak or susceptible to others, think we are independent and can handle it all on our own.  Am I guilty of this...YES BIG TIME!  I tend to use the "fake it until you make it" philosophy.  It is however, not always the smartest move on my part.  Enlisting others to help you out is not weakness.  In fact is shows great courage and strength.  I had a friend call me out on it.  She said, you help me so it is only fair that I get to do the same for you and she is right. Letting your emotions and problems out is the healthy way to deal with it, but it is not EASY.  You need someone you trust, lots of courage to face your fears and strength to let those emotions out and deal with it all.  Not something you can be expected to conquer overnight.  It takes baby steps.
     Just like the nurse judged me from sight, I was obviously hiding it well because my test came back positive for Influenza A.  It is a good reminder that people are extremely good at hiding what is really going on inside.  Therefore it important to be little bit kinder to everyone you meet, because you probably don’t know the battles they are facing.  Most importantly, it is very crucial that we are kinder to ourselves because we know the things we are facing!

XOXO

Tiffanee

The Curve Balls of Life...

      A few years ago I attended my first ever Mariners Fanfest.  The thrill of being there was incredible.  One of the things you could do at that time was get in the batter's cage and take a few pitches.  It had been awhile since I had stepped up to the plate and swung a bat so I was eager to have my shot at it.  After a long wait it was finally my turn.  I picked out the perfect bat, put on my helmet and walked up to the plate with confidence.  I took a practice swing and stood ready to hit that ball.  I watched the ball came soaring towards me, swung the bat and was excited that I had made contact with it...only to have the ball bounce and come back and hit me directly in the finger.  I shook it off and thought I could take my other 2 pitches, but found I could not grip the bat.  Feeling a bit defeated, I took off the helmet and walked out of the cage.  My family and I walked into the hallway and the next thing I knew everything went black and I woke up on the floor.  Medics were called and we were immediately taken out to the baseball field via the players tunnel (access that no one else had). They gave me an ice pack and had me sign some waivers.  Turns out I had broken my finger.  Looking back at this experience there was a very crucial mistake I had rushed in wanting to hit it so badly that I was not paying attention to the actual pitch coming towards me and it had been a wicked curve ball.

This was taken shortly after I passed out that day. 

       Frequently life throws us curve balls all of the time. When this happens it is a natural instinct to rush to that plate and want to hit it out of the park as quickly as possible.  Just as I wanted so badly that day I stepped in the batter's cage. The truth is most always if we were to just take care of it with one swing we would not learn or grow.  Just as in baseball it takes patience, practice and a clear vision to get through hard times. There is a reason the batter is given three strikes, not all pitches are meant to be hit.  Some we may think are the perfect pitch, but in reality have a nasty curve that we can't see at the moment and later realize that it was a blessing that we were able to dodge that ball and not get hit. There is always change in challenge (see what I did there).  There will be times when it feels like it takes all the strength you have just to stay in the game. You can barely hold on to that bat, but the important thing is you keep on swinging. With each swing you will gain strength, confidence, skills and knowledge you need to get through whatever you are dealing with. A friend recently explained to me the word "grit".  Not collapsing into despair, but to keep on swinging that bat and smiling. Happiness in life is not all about home runs. It’s the courage and strength to step up to the plate every single day no matter what. It's learning from the challenges and finding joy in the hits you get and progress you make. You can't rush it, just as I did that day I stepped in the batter's cage and got hit. It was a painful lesson.

   You learn to recognize "your pitch" and it WILL come along. After every hardship comes something incredible.  Hold on to that faith and that bat!

   My wise and incredible mom sent me this quote: 

"Life will always throw you curves, just keep fouling them off.  The right one will come, 

but when it does be prepared to run the bases".   

XOXO

Tiffanee

.